Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We were destined to go to rehab together
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Randomize
