if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Randomize
