I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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