I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize