he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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