arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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