i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
