If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
