If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
