You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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