just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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