What a fucking waste of an outfit
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
