In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
