Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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