ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize
