we have pet lesbian snakes
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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