She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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