Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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