Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
