I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
