I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
