you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Randomize
