Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize
