do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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