I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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