hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
