He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
