Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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