Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
