need another drink. this is the easiest way
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
