I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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