Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
i out mim tonsoeep
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