On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
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