She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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