You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize