I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i think my mom watched the whole time
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
