Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
