Duck Duck Cougar?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
