if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
