We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
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