guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
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