who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
