real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Is Oprah even human
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
