no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
