Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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