Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
