i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
