How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
