Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
