who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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